Thoughts About My Fanfic Writing Anniversary

[oakstone730]

It was two-years ago this month that I wrote my first fan-fiction story, written sitting at my desktop computer while my children played blocks and Little People on the floor behind me. In August, 2011, I did not know that fan-fiction existed, I was writing simply because I'd spent the summer re-reading the books and found myself reading the last couple chapters of Deathly Hallows again and again (already I was completely ignoring the Epilogue) trying to read between the lines and find more answers than the words on the pages were providing. I contemplated ordering the UK books to see if they provided more closure, but I knew they wouldn't, the answers weren't there.

At the playground, driving to school and work, I started composing what I thought happened next. When these thoughts became jumbled, I scribbled them down on an envelope in my purse. When I lost the envelope, I sat down at my computer and wrote out my thoughts, but then I started adding dialogue, and it started to build. My little bit of closure grew to be 22,000 words, and I was immensely proud of it, because it put a neat little bow to the seven books, and of course reflected what I wanted to see happen.

Still, I was embarrassed, I'd just spent two or three weeks writing a conclusion to someone else's story, and I couldn't really justify why. In a rare bit of honesty I confessed doing this to a virtual friend (the only kind I have) and she typed back: Oh, you wrote a fan-fic. I gave a virtual nod and immediately went to Google and searched fan-fic and got over six million hits as a return.

This was my first clue that the world was not flat.

A bit more searching and I was signed up for fanfiction.net (August 28, 2011) and uploading my story.

Since that moment, my second life began: I've written just under 600,000 words, 25 posted stories and about a dozen WiPs and plot bunnies. I would like to believe that my writing has improved - I still wince at the "the green-eyed boy" "the Slytherin" and "his eyes watched as..." that littered my early stories. And, I have made some lovely friends, and betas who have helped me have pushed me to not just put words on paper but to be sure that those words are telling the story I want told, and I have read millions of words by amazing authors who make this fandom such a wonderful place to participate and play in.

In my first life, my children are two-years older and are both in elementary school, my father died, my workplace has undergone multiple, stressful changes, and my husband is confused by why I like to write stories about gay guys.

Today, I fixed our bicycles so that we can take family bike rides, because I do need to find balance between these two lives. It is a give-and-take, and in a way I think that my writing-obsession also helps me be a better part of my family. It provides a creative release for a common frustration of parenting - I love my children but there are only so many games of Candyland one can tolerate before going a little nutty. Now that school has started I have almost two hours in the morning before heading to work, so I spend it on my screen room, with my laptop and coffee, writing. After school I'll go for a walk/scooter ride with my children (soon to be bike rides) and while listening to them chatter, I'll also be plotting my next story.

Life is good, balance is good.

Comments

[veritas03.livejournal.com]

Reading this lovely post about how you found fanfiction and fandom has left me smiling. I know exactly how you feel. And I'm very glad you found your way here. Your presence has enriched this fandom. ♥

[oakstone730.livejournal.com]

To me, the fact that the fan-fiction universe exists, and so relatively few people know about it, is astounding. I found a Time magazine article that described it as: Right now fan fiction is still the cultural equivalent of dark matter: it's largely invisible to the mainstream, but at the same time, it's unbelievably massive. << this seems like a very apt description.

I'm a librarian and one day I was talking with a parent who was returning a copy of Twilight, and she made a wistful comment about how it was the third time she'd read the series and that "I just wish it would go on forever" and I, feeling like we were standing in whatever the Twilight-equivalent would be of the entrance to Diagon Alley, suggested that she search Twilight fan-fiction. I often wonder if she did...

[impishtubist.livejournal.com]

There is so much I'd like to say about this, and I don't even know where to begin! I love that you wrote this and gave a little bit of background about how you got into fic writing - your journey is fascinating! I really love that you came to fanfiction on your own, without realizing what it was at first. It just happened for you. That's so cool.

(Incidentally, that's exactly how I started writing fic, too - it was all due to the gaps in HP that I wanted desperately to fill in or know more about. My middle-school scribbles never saw the light of day, though, thank goodness!)

And I really like that you talk about balancing your two lives. That's something I think about a lot, too. I've been posting fanfiction online for three years, and actively writing it for five. I have worried at various times that my second life is bleeding into and taking over my first, so it's good to know I'm not the only one thinking about balance.

(I feel like I had more to say, but it's late and I've been on the road all day. Whoops!)

Anyway, thank you for this little glimpse into your writing life! And thanks for sharing your stories! It has been great getting to know you better virtually these past two years :)

[oakstone730.livejournal.com]

And you were my guide through to this underworld. I remember the PM you sent me on Facebook after I posted that Time article about fan-fiction, something along the lines of "I feel like the grown-ups have just found out what the kids are up to in the basement" Still makes me laugh! Who knew?!?

I very much appreciated and loved your help when I peppered you with questions (What the heck is slash? What's a drabble?), until Urban Dictionary became my best-friend in translating all the lingo. Thank you, for all of that and for all of your words of support and encouragement. It has been terrific getting to know you, too!

[celestlyn.livejournal.com]

Well, happy two year anniversary! I hope you stay and continue to write lovely fic. It's interesting how different people get into fandom. I didn't know it existed either until Deathly Hallows was published. I have to laugh about the ones who are 25 and have been in fanfiction for 10 years or more. I would never have imagined that this whole world was hiding in plain sight.

[oakstone730.livejournal.com]

Doesn't it make you wonder what else is out there? To know that all this exists, and so (relative) few know about it. I'm constantly amazed and thrilled at the size of the fan-fiction world and am so happy that I discovered it, all thanks to a casual six-word sentence, by someone who still doesn't know what she unleashed!

[enchanted-jae.livejournal.com]

What a wonderful story! Thanks for sharing it. It's always fun to learn how others came to this little corner of the internet.

:D

[oakstone730.livejournal.com]

I would love to know how others stumbled across fan-fiction. To me it seems as though there should be a secret handshake or code word, I often wonder if I know RL people who are players down here, but like myself, can never talk about it.

[birdsofshore]

I love your story and I adore that you intuitively came to fanfic without knowing that it was a thing.

Your thoughts on balancing fandom and family life are interesting for me. I am always struggling with this and either feeling resentful that I have no time for writing, or guilty that I am not spending enough time with my children. I long to find a balance where it all works better (I fear this involves having more childcare than I have or can get currently!)

[oakstone730.livejournal.com]

I am definitely still seeking out the balance. I am always struggling with this and either feeling resentful that I have no time for writing, or guilty that I am not spending enough time with my children. this is what I am facing every day, and why I decided that I have to balance more. I don't want my children to remember me with my laptop constantly open, but I also don't want to give up this part of my life.

[capitu]

I love your story, that you felt the need to answer back to the books, you know? And to do so, in such a way, makes it all more wonderful.

Only two years, wow.

This was my first clue that the world was not flat.

<3 Well said.

[oakstone730.livejournal.com]

Thank you, honey! Discovering wonderful, generous, kind women like you is one of the reasons I so love this New World. It is about the sharing, support and enthusiasm that makes it so much fun to participate and play 'here'.

[who_la_hoop]

I love this! ♥ I definitely struggle with the balance, and with being very all or nothing when it comes to fandom, so it's interesting to read about how others feel/cope. Happy anniversary! :)